Money, Money, Money...

Sometimes people believe since I spent the early part of my career as a financial planner, I have some magical financial gifts. If only...I struggle as much or more than the next person with my relationship to money. In fairness, those early years might have ruined me. It was the late 1980's and I was instructed to work only with people earning six figures and worth over $1 million. I was surrounded by extravagant lifestyles...travel, clothes, fine wine and dining. Oh, those were the days!

Many of my wealthy clients were very happy...had families they loved and meaningful work. These folks seemed to have a healthy attitude about their money--they enjoyed it, but they weren't defined by it. There was an openness about them...with their resources and with their hearts. Working with them was rewarding and enjoyable. They seemed to appreciate the gifts they had been given.

Others seemed to have insatiable appetites for more, and a fierce determination to hold on to what they had--no matter what the cost. I remember a young surgeon earning $450,000 per year. He had every luxury you might expect for someone in his situation, but he was overly-concerned about losing his money. It was as if holding on tight caused him great pain. His wealth was a source of stress, instead of relief. When I reviewed his tax return and saw he only donated $1,500 per year to charity, I was disappointed (and judgmental). This same man repeatedly cancelled appointments and had little respect for my time. Ultimately, I fired him as a client.

When Malcolm traveled to Zambia five years ago he was deeply touched by the generous spirit of the people there. Even though most earned less than $1 per day, they seemed to be living joyfully. Young orphans in tattered clothes prayed fervently with Malcolm, they laughed and played on the grounds of the Catholic Convent they called "home." A woman living in nothing more than a tin shack smiled broadly when she learned Malcolm was a minister and wanted him to know, "God has been good to me!" Families destroyed by AIDS would take in yet another mouth to feed, sharing the little that they had.

This money thing, it is tricky for many of us. I am not saying we should live as if we were in a third world economy. Thankfully, money allows us to have and do many great things. It can also own us, become an obsession, hold too high of a place in our hearts. Tangled in the web of our money beliefs are messages from our parents, cultural norms, past successes and failures, fears about the economy, desires to look and feel good. Some of the most important decisions we make have to do with how we choose to earn, save, give, and spend our money.

I wonder if our African brothers and sisters don't have a lesson for us about smiling in the sun, regardless of what we are wearing, giving thanks for the blessings we do have, and making room for those in need.

Could it be that our relationship with money reflects something deeper in our hearts? How does our relationship with money impact our other relationships? Financial freedom is a term that has been defined many ways. I wonder if it doesn't have something to do with appreciating what we have, living within our means, and sharing the gifts we have been given with great joy. I wonder if financial freedom isn't about appreciating the ebb and flow...receiving...giving...receiving...giving.

I invite you to take some time and consider:

• How would I define my relationship with money?
• In what way(s) does money impact relationships with others?
  
• What does financial freedom mean to me?
• What one step could I take today to better align my money with my values?

Namaste