Day 32: Life as a Prayer

"Mom, I don't understand, my whole life is a prayer." That was Kiki's response to a question I posed during a "home church" service a few years ago.

What a mind-blower!

There is a lot of confusion about prayer. Once I read a book that made it seem as if we prayed in just the "right" way we could manifest whatever we wanted in our lives. Kind of like a prayer ATM. When I tried this "practice" I found myself concerned about whether I was doing it right. If things didn't work out the way I thought they should, I would wonder if I had prayed wrong. How crazy is that?

The book and movie, "The Secret" has been an answer to prayer for the author, but I am not so sure about the rest of us. It seems like an extension of the thinking that angered me when Rhonda was dying of cancer. Think/pray the right way and this cancer will go away...a fabulous way to heap guilt on those who are sick, or poor, or suffering in some way.

Maybe the REAL SECRET is to attain an inner peace no matter what the external circumstances...not some mindset that can't find the Sacred in the suffering; or a materialistic prosperity prayer. (Nothing wrong with prosperity mind you.)

I know some folks are tired of "God language" being used as a club to beat their way of thinking into other's heads. Showy, public displays of prayer fly in the face of Jesus' command to, "go into your room, close the door and pray...." Matthew 6:6

Some people wonder if intercessory prayer is an arrogant way of telling God what to do...Also, there is an uncomfortable connotation here that perhaps God is a puppeteer pulling strings, "HMMMM let's give Mary a dose of cancer and fix Joey's broken radiator...Oops! Nevermind, he prayed the wrong way!"

The Quakers have a beautiful way of holding people and intentions, "in the light." Since learning of this practice, when I know of someone in need; or I am thinking about someone I love and want to bless, I "hold them in the light." Taking a moment to send blessing is a way for me to love that person...and to trust the LOVE which created all of us.

Those of us who desire a connection to the Sacred/God/Beloved/Divine/Love...whatever name you want to use, crave a way to communicate...a way to be in relationship.

If we were to take Kiki's perspective on prayer-what is it we are praying? Are we praying good will and love? Are we praying worry and strife? Are we praying healing, supportive presence? Are we praying anger and jealousy? What are our prayers??

Mother Theresa said, "I always begin my prayers in silence, for it is in the silence of the heart that God speaks. God is the friend of silence. We need to listen to God, because it is not what we say, but what God says to us and through us that matters."

Couldn't sleep last night, the after-dinner pot of decaf turned out to be regular. Then this morning I woke up too early...4:30. Before I knew it, I found my tired self on my knees, hands folded, head on the couch. Words wouldn't come...just emotion...just desire for connection...just a sense that taking the time to remember there is a Benevolent Presence breathing with me, that matters. Blissful silence...

I am wondering if all prayers don't come back to this...how can I live my life like a prayer? What would be the most LOVING thing I could do in this moment? If that were our guiding principle, how much better would our world be?

Holding you "in the light." Namaste